When I first sat down to meditate, I had no idea what I was doing. I crossed my legs and closed my eyes and tried to will myself into an altered state of consciousness.
It didn’t work….
I had seen pictures. I had heard stories. But I had no idea what to do. After several weeks, I gave up in frustration.
But then, I turned back to prayer and said, “Lord, I have no idea what I’m doing. So you’re going to have to send me a teacher that can show me how to do this.”
Amazingly, He did. Through a series of conversations with various healers that were now in my circle, I found someone who could teach me meditation.
I attended a weekend meditation retreat. And it’s important to tell you I truly believed at some point in my healing journey, someone was going to perform some therapy or teach me some technique that was going to help me understand Everything…something that would unravel all the mysteries of the universe and help me come to some cosmic understanding of what things were and I’d be miraculously healed.
As I sat in meditation, my first experience was one of growing agitation. I felt very uncomfortable and I didn’t want to be there.
When I surrendered to that feeling, I felt a deep sense of peace wash over me. I suddenly felt very serene. And a deep feeling of love began to well up within the center of my chest, in my heart.
And then it exploded, right out of my chest!
I ask myself, “Is this what I’ve been looking for?” And I heard clearly, inside of myself, a heavenly voice say, “Yes, this is everything you’ve been searching for. This is who you are.”
And I wept, and wept, and wept….